Shared Values Exercise – For Couples Therapists

When couples arrive in therapy, they can become consumed by the details of the latest argument.

Who said what.
Who was hurt.
Who is right.
Who is to blame.

Sound familiar?

Beneath the conflict, there’s often a deeper question they have lost sight of:

what are we trying to build together?

The Shared Values Exercise helps couples step back from the tension and reconnect with what matters – their values.

It gives both partners a simple, structured, and powerful way to identify their individual values, come to the table together, and begin shaping their shared relationship values.

These are the values they want to live by. Things like:

Trust. Respect. Kindness. Honesty. Connection. Love. Intimacy. Stability. Growth. Family.

This free worksheet is extracted from the Life Values Method™ Practitioner Handbook and includes helpful practitioner instructions and prompts to support an effective couples session.

This work is foundational. It helps set the scene for deeper conversations, clearer communication, repair, commitment, emotional safety, shared meaning, and renewed direction.

For committed couples, shared values work can help stabilise the relationship and create a stronger sense of hope about what they are building together.

Download the free Shared Values Exercise PDF below and use it as a practical tool in your couples work.